More doctor’s visits today. Today, expecting bad news, but not like, terrible bad news. Just what I’ve always known. Going in for an airborne allergen test today. No foods or medications, just a scratch test on all the things that cause my sinuses to shut and my life to be miserable. Lately, my allergies have been getting worse, and I suspect that part of that is related to my decreasing health, which I am actively trying to combat once again, but I just can’t seem to explain it: the older I get, the harder the springtime gets for me. This year I only made it through after mainlining Zyrtec every day, regardless of symptoms. It worked, and I was glad for it, and that’s a price I’m willing to pay if I have to, but I suppose in a way it’ll be nice to know in defined terms what exactly is causing me to suffer. I’m just expecting to have more positives on this test than negatives at this point.
Good ass day. Good people, good times, good games, good productivity, good reading, good food, good everything. I’m sleepy, but still feeling good, still doing things. Going to bed soon, eventually, and I’ll sleep well into the night, and wake up, and do it all over again. It’s crazy, I had this portent, that after the sneezing, after the only dead scorpion seen by my eyes, that I was leaving behind a dark chapter in my life, leaving behind struggles and something trying to put me down. Now I’m ready to move on, and I feel like I’m there and ready to do bigger and better things. I love it. I’m full of positive energy and excitement and motivation. So watch out, because I’m popping my knuckles and stretching my back and ready to put the work in. Gonna get big stuff out by putting big stuff in. Don’t take that the wrong way.
Moving is finally done. We have to drop the keys off in the morning and pay for the carpet cleaning, which makes things super-tight financially, but after this month it should be much better. Ah well. Now I’m just tired. I spent so much time sneezing on the final day of cleaning that I felt genuinely sick. Slept it off for a while, woke up and it was dark out, but I felt better. Still, just tired. My plans are to be productive, get work done, but not get too crazy. I’m gonna work on a couple boxes a day, get things more organized, more tidy. Get laundry done. Clean clean clean, work work work. By November, it should be life as normal. Looking forward to that. But for now, feeling tired, getting things done, writing in blogs. Doctors appointments. Cleaning. Getting a more normal sleep schedule, for a while. Then do it all over again.
Didn’t go back to the apartment to clean last night. Came close, just couldn’t get the motivation. So I worked instead. Stayed very productive, put in a full work day. Tonight, people are coming over for pizza and football and friendship, and once that’s all over and done with, I will head over to the apartment, make some noise, clean some things. Glad to think that it’s almost a done deal, that I don’t have to worry about simultaneous existence. I can wake up in the same house that I go to sleep in and know that everything I need pretty much is in the one place. There’s still a ton of unpacking to do, and that will get done with time. But for now, I’m hanging up posters, thinking about the best way to clean a bathroom, and getting ready for fantasy football and naps with the television on, the white noise of a crowd interspersed with noisy commercials for beers and trucks.
Almost everything is moved now. We did all the big stuff today. There’s still basically 2 days left to clean. I need to make sure that the porches are clean, I need to vacuum the bedroom and wipe it down a bit, same for the closet, I’ve gotta REALLY clean the bathroom, and then make sure the kitchen and living room are clean enough. Not looking forward to it, but it’s something I can power through and do and then be tired and not want to do anything for the rest of the week but still need to do stuff because there’s a party in 2 weeks and I need to be able to at least fit everything in my office and not have it out in the way. Oh, and find new clients and make money and do all that stupid stuff. Being an adult – it’s stupid and doesn’t come recommended.
I had intended to sleep last night, even for maybe just a couple of hours, before having to get up and leave for my doctor’s appointment (any minute now), but then a funny thing happened. I was holding a book in one hand for work, reading it one chapter at a time, and also browsing some websites for inspiration, less so for work, and then was getting ready to take a little break from all that multi-tasking and take a beat to breathe. Then the internet started acting weird. Everything broke except Facebook, and even then Facebook was just barely working. Then everything died. And for four hours, I was without internet. Now, when the power goes out, so do I. I just nap right then and there usually. When the internet goes out, I feel compelled to keep an eye on it, to know when it returns. So I was up all night, getting caught up on TV, reading, organizing, and now I’m going to go to my doctor’s appointment (times two), do a little grocery shopping, come home, and certainly almost immediately fall asleep.
Probably should be going to bed at a decent hour tonight. Going to the doctor’s tomorrow for a chest x-ray I probably don’t need and to get results of blood work that I anticipate will come back with bad news. Because yeah, I’ve put on a bunch of weight, and I don’t eat as well as I should. But that’s okay. I’m dreading it, but like, if I need to lose weight again, medical reasons will get me off my ass and do it, because as you all well know, I like to live. And not living seems like a pretty poor alternative. Thoughts like these have kept sleep elusive from me, and after a couple nights of that, I’m stuck on some bad sleeping hours. I’ve got an apartment to clean and depart from entirely in the next seven days, and then after that, I’m flipping my schedule all the way around to get to somewhere normal-ish. For a while. And then that’ll change too. Damn the need for sleep, I think there’s just too much in this world to do to be dormant.