Nerve Ending

Posted: May 2, 2017 in Uncategorized

Got all the house cleaning I want to get done this week (so far), which isn’t much, but I have a strong policy about doing just a few key things every week, and as time permits, adding to that. So in that regard I keep a few rooms of the house very clean, a few pretty clean, a few sort of clean, and a few are an absolute mess. I prioritize this by a few factors, and one of them admittedly is how much of a job it is to clean up. Doing some front porch maintenance is nothing compared to making sure everything in my office is in its right place, making sure I have clean clothes is as simple as putting things in an appliance, compared to scrubbing down the entire kitchen or the toilet. And then when I have less busy weeks, less demands on my time, I expand my domain as time and energy permits. This week, I stopped at the dishes.

Hell of a weekend, energy was high internally even though I was pretty much constantly sleepy. Just good things going on. And it’s tense too, there’s a lot of unanswered questions, but overall I feel positive and strong about the direction in which things are moving. Made affiliate status on Twitch, now that the program exists, and it’s been just a ton of fun to work with what that comes along with, at least for now. Got all my Patreon rewards done in the zero hour and I’m ready to get started on this month’s so that by the end of the month I can just relax. Of course I am a little worried about next month, how it’s all going to work out, how it’s going to feel to take a week off of work. I have to be honest, the prospect is more frightening than relaxing. I try not to be a creature of habit but I just don’t know quite how to turn that side of me off anymore, at least not for that long.

Pinch of Sandwich

Posted: April 26, 2017 in Uncategorized

Probably the last blog post of the month/week right here. Might sneak one in before we’re done but this is probably it. So what is there to say? I mean, 2017 is officially 1/3 over now, which is crazy to think. Time does really seem to go by so quickly when you start thinking of it in the big picture, and in the small moment it stretches on forever, in permanence. And yet you wake up one morning and you look at the calendar and you think: “Oh god, is it almost my birthday again?” Meanwhile you stand in line at the grocery store for more than 2 minutes and start to feel your blood boiling over. Life, time, these exist in two states, the observed and the unobserved. Like a child trying to steal a cookie from the kitchen. Maybe that’s why there’s all that talk about appreciating life and living in the moment – if you take stock of it all the time, can you stretch a day into forever?

Chasing Model Trains

Posted: April 25, 2017 in Uncategorized

Head’s been hurting since I woke up. Not like a real pain, not something screaming out at me, but definitely something that I noticed from the moment I woke up, like someone left standing water pooling in the far back of my head and I can feel it sloshing around whenever I move. It’s making me a little lethargic, maybe not as confidently productive as I would like, and so I will most likely target the things that I enjoy doing versus the things that absolutely need doing and aren’t personally satisfying today. And maybe, with food and caffeine and just being awake longer, that feeling will pass, and I can work on cleaning, or doing some book reviews, or what have you. Maybe even get a stream in today, I don’t know, but for now I am content to be kept quiet and focus in on some solitary pursuits and still feel like I got something done while feeling like a car accident myself.


Posted: April 24, 2017 in Uncategorized

End of the month, start of the week. Pulling all-nighters to get to a normalish sleep schedule for a while while my social calendar fills up, and at the same time, rushing to be private and get a lot done on the work front. One week left to get some big projects done, one week left to add to this month’s payroll. So there’s this sort of constant contradiction of inconveniencing myself so that others can count on me, and working constantly so that I might not have time for others. It’s all very confusing, but the important thing is this: if I’m up all night the way that I am when I’m in transition like this, I have a solid six to eight hours a day where I don’t have to worry about anything but getting stuff done. I might be a little sleep deprived as I need to be awake for things that I promised I would do while also trying to be asleep at hours that make more sense to me say, a week from now, but that has been a sacrifice I have been happy to make time and time again in my life.


Posted: April 17, 2017 in Uncategorized

Life is kind of getting back to normal now, it’s nice. Got the usual weekly laundry to do today, and working on a lot of reading, but also the girlfriend is back home and the temporary diet restrictions are over. I feel better after resetting some bad eating habits, and I think I’ll do them more in the future just to keep my body active and adaptive to any situations that come up. This week, my plan is pretty straightforward, work on my two big projects, stream in the downtime, produce produce produce. There isn’t really anything else to take my focus away from those goals, at least not yet, but I am thankful that my current desk is both wooden and knockable. If I seem a little out of touch this week, there is a lot of reading and writing going on, things that I can’t focus on anything else while I do them.

Magnetic Strips

Posted: April 10, 2017 in Uncategorized

Time for the weekly ramble, I suppose. Not much going on this week, but I’m supplementing my usual habits with the need to go out and look for new things. The problem is that my current habits make me quite productive in all the ways that I want to be productive, but tends to let the oddball task here and there go by the wayside. So I’m incorporating those errands into my daily routine when work is on the slower side, like it is now for example. So I’m organizing some little one-time things that need to get done, going grocery shopping more often, got my taxes done, etc. It feels like I’m just sort of filling time, but then….I am, really. The whole point is just to make sure that certain things don’t go undone but also that I don’t just spend my whole day working on one big thing.